Get my ass kicked or collect two hundred dollars?

I’ve had a back-and-forth comment war with Stuart Rhoden for a couple of days. You may recall that Stuart is the guy who was running for Scottsdale Unified School District governing board before he wasn’t. I think he figured out that being a card-carrying member of the Denise Birdwell pom squad pretty much disqualified him from elected office.

The Scottsdale Independent published an article on Friday that recapped the timeline of recent SUSD corruption. Stuart posted a comment on the article, in which he said,

“And the real question is where do we go from here? Another year and more infighting, or do we really respect Scottsdale students?

“We are all aware of the indiscretions of the previous administration, but how to move forward, onward and upward.”

Stuart wasn’t riding the pine during the efforts of concerned parents and taxpayers to root out the corruption and abuse. Worse than doing nothing, he was actively opposing reform efforts, and abusing those folks with false accusations of racism. Now he’s saying that opposing the corruption is the problem? The taxpayers are the problem?

These hypocritical, self-serving comments were pretty aggravating to me and to many others. So, I replied:

“‘Infighting’ must be a synonym for ‘reform obstructionism,’ as practiced by Birdwell and Birdwell’s carnies, including Rhoden, Chris Schild, Nancy Cantor, Ed Richard, and Jose Velarde.”

And that’s when the fight started [Apologies to Jeff Foxworthy].

I’ll skip a lot of the muddle in the middle (including Stuart’s class-baiting), and get right to the end. Stuart sent me a Facebook private message today in which he said,

“When you’re ready to have an adult conversation without snark and attacks, let’s sit down. Until then, keep my name out your mouth, blog, and post. These personal attacks of yours serve no one.”

I have to give him some credit. “Keep my name out your mouth,” is a new one on me. I’ll file that for future reference. It’s not quite the erudite banter I’d expect from a PhD Arizona State University faculty member and Scottsdale Human Relations Commission appointee. But it’s worth remembering.

Now I’ve been threatened before (as documented elsewhere on these pages), and by much scarier guys than Stuart. So, I’m not really worried about him.

In fact, I got a chuckle out of it, because it reminded me of one of my favorite movies.

Vinny: J.T., I believe you and Lisa played a game of pool for two hundred dollars, which she won; I’m here to collect.

J.T.: How ’bout if I just kick your ass?

Vinny: Oh, a counteroffer. That’s what we lawyers–I’m a lawyer–we call that a counteroffer. Let me see, this is a tough decision you’re givin’ me here. Get my ass kicked or collect two hundred dollars? Hmm, let me think. I could use a good ass kickin’, I’ll be very honest with you. Nah, I think I’ll just go with the two hundred.[laughter].

J.T.: Over my dead body.

Vinny: You like to renegotiate as you go along, huh? Okay then, here’s my counteroffer: do I have to kill you? What if I was just to kick the ever-lovin’ s[tuff] outta ya?

J.T.: In your dreams.

Vinny: Oh, no, no, no, in reality. If I was to kick the s[tuff] outta ya, do I get the money?

J.T.: (contemplates this) If you kick the s[tuff] outta me…

Vinny: Yeah.

J.T.: …then you get the money.[weak laughter].

…

Vinny: Oh. Okay, let’s see if we agree on the terms. The choice now is: I get my ass kicked, or, option B: I kick your ass, and collect the 200.

I’m goin’ with option B (takes his coat off): Kickin’ your ass and collectin’ two-hundred dollars.

J.T.: Are we gon’ fight now?

Vinny: Yeah. First let me see the money.

J.T.: I have the money.

Vinny: All right, show it to me.

J.T.: I can get it.

Vinny: You can get it? All right, get it. Then we’ll fight.

Here’s a link to the bar fight scene from the movie: https://youtu.be/_M42tgfNuNA

Meanwhile, let me see the money, Stuart.